New Zealand

Talking about going on tour at the moment... very exciting - though Mark just stated...

"YOU CAN DRIVE TO NEW ZEALAND FROM HERE........................... CAN'T YOU????"

Sorry, just wait for a minute while a pick myself up off the ground from laughing

X L

It's A BIT of Rice...

Cooking in the kitchen I asked Mark if he could please open the rice... to my disbelief the next thing I saw was about 1 kilo of rice going across my kitchen bench and all over the floor. "Don't worry!" I was told... "Its just A BIT of rice"...

Mark went and got the vacuum cleaner to clean up.... but instead of the switch on suck... it was on BLOW....

Needless to say the rice wasn't confined to the kitchen anymore


X L

Ruby's 'Ruff' Trot!

I have a story to tell you about my beautiful red Huskie Ruby (she is on the left, and that's Nooka on the right).

Ruby was my dog, she loved me and only me and always misbehaved for Mark... unlike Nooka, who is the exact opposite. She loves Mark and can be a little naughty for me.

Unfortunately, last year Ruby passed away.

Devastated, Mark and I decided to have cremated so we could keep her forever. We now have her ashes in a wooden box

Ruby lived on our tiered coffee table for awhile - when one day Mark got in while I was out and did the vacuuming. As he vacuumed, Mark hit the coffee table which accidentally collapsed! Everything fell in smashing to the ground... when all of a sudden to Mark's horror - there was a sandy gritty matter scattered EVERYWHERE... Horrified, Mark got the dustpan and ever so carefully started scooping up the remains - wondering how he was going to tell me what had happened... Poor Ruby...

.... No not really :-) I had a candle in a vase next to her, that had some sand and grit in the bottom of it. Ruby was still safe, sound and concealed in her box.

Needless to say though - she now lives on top of Mark's book shelf - out of harms, and the vacuum's way.

Good Behaviour Bond

I am starting to have my suspicions that Mark is either up to something... or broken something - because he has been behaving really well of late.

X L

Trailer Trash

We went to Bunnings this morning to pick up some staples for the staple gun (getting ready to paint the town yellow with our 'Naughty Night Out' posters).

I was waiting in the car whilst Mark went in, and upon his return he presented me with some lunch... a good ol' snag on bread from the locals raising money with their sausage sizzle out the front of Bunnings. So we weren't driving and eating we decided to eat in the car park before we got on our way. Soon after, a ute with a trailer pulled up beside us.

Quick to act Mark said 'Hurry and finish your lunch, I've just found a bin for the rubbish'... I asked Mark 'Are you serious?' and he said no don't be ridiculous.... but the next thing i knew my serviette was taken from me, scrunched up, thrown out the window of our car - into next doors trailer and Mark started the car and took off....

So to the young guy who probably went to load his trailer today, only to find Mark and my serviettes in it - I do apologise but it wasn't my fault.

The Bloody Laundry!

Mark shut me in the bloody laundry again - in the dark!

I Need to Clarify!

After my blog entitled 'Ummm!" I was bombarded with emails over the photo that was attached - asking "Was it real?" etc etc

No - it wasn't....

FYI I have attached another pic of Mark to clarify now what is real, and he sure puts the Sex Machines Australia to shame :-)

x L

'T' is for...

The phone rang this morning and Mark answered - helping another person give up smoking.

The gentleman was taking down Mark's website www.Hypnotist.com.au and was having a little trouble spelling the word 'Hypnotist' as many do - so Mark spelt it out for him... it went something a little like....

MARK: "H-Y-P-N-O-T-I-S-T dot com dot au...
CLIENT: "P" as in Peter....
MARK: "No, 'T' - as in 'T' for Tit.......

- lucky it was from one bloke to another I guess...

x L

"Table for 3, Sir"

The three of us went out for dinner just recently. A pleasant waitress approached us, and uttered the obvious - "table for 3"?
"No actually", says Mark, in a very serious voice. "Could I have one table for my wife and I, and another for my NAN here, as far from ours as possible."
THE POOR GIRL - he can be really convincing.

Airports!

Mark MUST embarass me when he has to drop me off at the airport.
He waits until I am far enough away so that he has to shout. His favourite phrases are, "SEE YOU NAN" or "DON'T BE IN ANY HURRY TO COME BACK"
I go to great lengths to avoid these moments now - I actually drove to Newcastle last month.

Going to the Dentist CAN be fun!

Whilst in the Dentist's chair the other day, I heard a message come through on my phone. As I had to wait my turn at Reception, decided to read it - I WAS taken by surprise! It was a photo of Vegas - Mark and Loranda's 3 week old little girl, sound asleep, in her father's arms, wearing one of my wigs. Yes, Mark had stumbled across it and couldn't help himself.

Of course, I was in hysterics looking at this photo , not a good look with a "big fat lip" AND not easy to do. I actually felt the need to apologise to everyone else in the waiting room and didn't waste any time getting out of there. THANKS MARK!

Ummm...

As you probably know Mark is performing in a fantastic show called 'Naughty Night Out' (www.NNO.com.au)

One of the entertainers name is Pricasso, who is also a great friend of ours.

Because of some of the laws in QLD, Pricasso has had to design a 'G String' to cover his real penis, and come up with a fantastic way to do so... The only problem is that Mark has now claimed Pricasso's invention for his own and has taken to modelling it all for you now :-)

Mark... Stick with Hypnotism - you are going backwards with penile art!

My Husband The Coal Miner... NOT!

I grew up in a mining town in Central Queensland called Middlemount and come from a family of coal miners. My Poppy was a coal miner, and both my father and brother are both coal miners today.

Back in August 2008 Mark was lucky enough to be taken underground and get a small taste of what life is like for a coal miner.

He came above ground 'as black as the ace of spades'.

I had such a giggle when I asked him "What was it like?"

His reply... "I'M STICKING TO HYPNOTISM!"

Introducing Robbie (Breakfast)

Hello, I'm Robbie - "Breakfast" in this crazy house.
I have been living with Mark and Loranda for some time now, and believe me, there is never a dull moment - and I love it!
We enjoy, with gusto, the simple things in life, especially our Mark.
He teases, taunts and annoys constantly - but we wouldn't have it any other way.
Life is great, thanks to this man!
Let us share some of this sunshine. We want you to get to know "our Mark". He loves to read, drinks too much coffee, makes a fabulous chicken caesar salad - and - can be very naughty.
So, Loranda and I are now here to spill the beans.
I'm sure you will enjoy our stories.

Robbie

Introducing Loranda (Bed)

Hi,

As you have probably gathered my name is Loranda and I am Mark's wife (the bed part to this blog). Robbie and I have decided to set this blog up to give you an insight into the 'Real Mark Anthony' - the prankster we live with.

I love my husband very much and I wouldn't trade him for the World (Sorry!), but our lovely house mate Robbie (the 'Breakfast') and I are constantly air horned, tricked, teased and have jokes played on us - and now it is time to share with you all the 'fun' we have living with Australia's Busiest Hypnotist, Mark Anthony.

From the day we met he has always been very fun loving - and a practical joker. Makes my life very interesting to say the least.

We hope you get has many laughs from our blog that we get living day to day with Mark.

x L